The original pervy hobbit fancier (cassieclaire) wrote,
The original pervy hobbit fancier
cassieclaire

excerpt from Sauron's diary

The Secret Diary of Sauron

Day One: Dirty weekend with Elrond turned sour when I told him purple was not his color.

Day Five Have been marched against by last alliance of men and nancing elves. Is transparent attempt by Elrond to get back at me for comment about purple. I will not take it back! I told him purple made him look like an eggplant, and it does. Is no need for him to get so shirty about it.

Day Six Is not that being defeated by last alliance is so bad, is not even that being reduced to a disembodied eyeball is so bad, although Visine would be a comfort. But whose bright idea was it to slice onions in here?

-later-

Blast those orcs and their fondness for onion dip. Have taken their disco ball away. God, it's fun to be evil.

***
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weetanya

March 19 2002, 12:25:41 UTC 16 years ago

i love you cassieclaire! i hope that's ok.

ex_material505

March 19 2002, 12:27:41 UTC 16 years ago

Day 3425435: Am finally on first page of worshippers. Go me! heh, that rocks...keep going please :D

buffett

March 19 2002, 12:29:37 UTC 16 years ago

is not even that being reduced to a disembodied eyeball is so bad, although Visine would be a comfort. But whose bright idea was it to slice onions in here?

Wheee! more Very Secret Diary entries!

Off to vote for Fictionalley, now.

technocracygirl

March 19 2002, 12:55:54 UTC 16 years ago

Heehee! Even better than the Legolas diary. Wonderful!

shirley

March 19 2002, 12:57:44 UTC 16 years ago

Definitely FUN FUN FUN to be evil. Poor Sauron. Very funny as regards the references to the ubiquitous purple dress and disco ball.

Go Cassie! I love these diaries and missed them already. More, more! ^__^

kvschwartz

March 19 2002, 13:27:51 UTC 16 years ago

are you going to publish this stuff?

Gotta love 'em

Anonymous

March 19 2002, 13:34:36 UTC 16 years ago

*Blast those orcs and their fondness for onion dip. Have taken their disco ball away. God, it's fun to be evil.*
Hehehe, thats my favorite line! Keep up the good work! Yay! I'm on the first page! *does little happy dance*

This is some good shtuff

Anonymous

March 19 2002, 13:37:42 UTC 16 years ago

Yay, on first page! Go me. No, I love these diaries. I check here every day. Cannot wait for me. Must go fondle jewelery. Okay, bad imitation. :)

Excellent work!

curtana

March 19 2002, 13:39:48 UTC 16 years ago

I just wanted to add my congrats to everyone else's piles of congrats. If you write it, we will come! :)

Anonymous

March 19 2002, 13:41:46 UTC 16 years ago

i love these journals. they're so funny. i love the part about the onions. haha. ur so good at writing these things. keep up the good work.

Anonymous

March 19 2002, 13:54:55 UTC 16 years ago

At last! I've waited a long time for the next diary. (We all have). I'll take your word for it on Fiction Alley - although I love the HP books, I can't say I'm into the fan fiction there.(Although I must confess to a sneaking longing to read THE story, to see how bad it really is.)

Keep up the brilliant work, and don't let the b****rd get you down!!

(I'm not really anonymous, I'm jayembee100@hotmail.com)

heidi8

March 20 2002, 04:10:33 UTC 16 years ago

Oh, you should give it a try, especially if you've never been to FA before - check out http://www.fictionalley.org/fictionalleypark and click on a few fics!

funny!!!!!! ^_^

thematrixhasme

March 19 2002, 14:34:29 UTC 16 years ago

Visine?!?! LOL!!!! Onions... disco ball.. *hyperventilates* You are too funny! ^_^

Wheee!

Anonymous

March 19 2002, 15:14:54 UTC 16 years ago

Yay Cass! Now instead of everyone begging, "When are you going to write more?" Now we can beg, "When are you going to finish that?"

:) Add me to your list of devoted fans!

Heather

athene

March 19 2002, 15:24:50 UTC 16 years ago

what a brilliant start!! Can't wait to read the rest of it!!!!

weeeeee!!!

malacite

March 19 2002, 15:46:52 UTC 16 years ago

yes!!!!! i went away for 10 days and i come home to this!! yipee!! cannot wait until the rest. great great start! i can so see this happening. elrond should learn to take criticism and not get so shirty, i totally agree. lol. keep up the good work!

and you definently have my vote for fictionalley as top site :D
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